Monday, August 13, 2007

Man, I hope she sues. Sheesh.

This is a new low for Perez's strange that he vilifies celebrities for hypocrisy yet is hoisted on his own sanctimonious petard.

Britney Spears, my favorite celebrity target, might be a willful child masquerading as a single mother, but her cousin hasn't sought out that same notoriety or fame. It's shameful and smacks of singular douchebaggery. It's bad enough that this young woman lost her mother recently, and it's also rough to watch someone you care about unravel their own life...but this is ridiculous. Way to pile on, Perez.

I'm almost unsure as to which is worse - harrassment of a private citizen just because she's Britney Spears' first cousin, or the cultural idiocy of commenters on that particular entry.

For the record, I've spent nearly all my life living below the Mason-Dixon line. I have never dated (much less anything else) a cousin, I don't chew tobacco, and I don't have any children. I say "y'all" and adore sweet tea, fried green tomatoes and boiled crawfish. I wear flip-flops in the winter, and own a collection of sundresses rivaled only by M.'s astonishingly large collection of Ann Taylor clothing. I obsess over college football and think Drew Brees exemplifies everything last year's Saints' marketing slogan represents (erm..."Be a Saint). I also think he's adorably cute. I generally type and speak with proper grammar when I'm formally addressing someone. I send thank-you notes and always bring hostess (or host) gifts when invited to someone's house. I usually love hot weather. I don't generally have a southern accent unless I'm a) really, really, really tired, or b) angrier than Lindsay Lohan after a coke binge.

Trash is trash - southerners do not corner the market on poor grammar and ignorance. Britney Spears is a poor representation of southern women, and certainly doesn't represent the vast majority of us.


(Sorry, it's so hot here in New Orleans today that I'm sweating like Britney Spears before a custody hearing...and I really dislike regional and cultural stereotypes. Ad hominem attacks are a poor device employed by ignorant, anonymous internet bullies incapable of making an original point.)

Speaking of bullies...I found this article from the LSU student newspaper about how hesitant Laura Lynne Covington is to speak about her cousin, and how adamant she is about protecting her own private life. I hope she uses that very intelligent brain of hers to layeth the smack down on Mario Lavandeira (nee Perez Hilton) with the vengeance of an irate southern woman (that's about as close to stereotyping said group as I get).

Trust wouldn't like us when we're upset, bless your heart.


Brooke said...

Pissing off any woman is a bad idea. However, insulting a Southern Lady - watch out. She'll rip you to shreads with a smile and a bless your heart. By the time she's done with you (even if she provoked it), everyone is on her side, you're the bad guy and you might just be drug out in the field somewhere and beaten.

Trash exists everywhere. We just try to hide it under our beds and not acknowledge it. This poor girl tried to keep it under wraps instead of displaying it proudly like Christmas Lights on your house in the month of May. That makes her a Lady. Watch your back, Mario-"i-dont-have-a-life-so-i-make-fun-of-other-people-under-an-assumed-name-because-i'm-a-coward" Lavandeira, Bless Your Heart.

April Elizabeth said...

I don't understand the point of his article. Is he tryinig to imply that Britney can onnly have one cousin at a time? Is it not possible she has more than one aunt or uncle who procreated?

Beyond that I have plenty of people I call cousins that I grew up with you are not cousins. There may not be a blood relation but they know more about me than some of my real cousins.

Did anyone really think LauraLynn was missing?