Monday, November 19, 2007

Will he or won't we?

Is Les Miles destined to remain in Baton Rouge, or is the Big House in Ann Arbor calling his name?

Since Michigan's disastrous season-opening loss to Appalachian State, sportswriters and bloggers (including your petite little wordsmith) have been speculating as to Lloyd Carr's fate with the Wolverines.

Earlier today, he announced his retirement from coaching, effectively ending things on his own terms. Let the games begin, folks. 2007's version of Coaching Musical Chairs is about to begin.

Will Miles remain at LSU, or will he return to his roots at Michigan? Will Tuberville remain at Auburn, knowing that they secretly tried to replace him with Petrino a few years ago? Or will he take Franchione's spot at Texas A&M? More importantly, at least for local fans, who would replace Miles at the helm of the Bayou Bengals? Here are a few names I've heard bandied about:

  • Mark "Land Manatee" Mangino (don't laugh, he's taken meh talent at KU and transformed the Jayhawks into more than just a basketball school)
  • Steve "Pruneface" Spurrier (Louisiana has proven fertile and easy recruiting ground for LSU, but is it enough to lure the Ol' Ball Coach from his afternoon golf game?)
  • Jimbo "Please, No, We Like Him Immensely at FSU" Fisher (As the boyfriend points out, this would only be feasible if LSU were willing to clean house of all of Miles' staff, given the animosity between the, we really, really, REALLY like him at FSU and would like to keep him there. This admonition goes for you, too, Georgia Tech. And Auburn, too. Stay away from our OC, or we will be forced to throw the power of the Bobby upon you.)
  • Bo "Hey, guys, I'm still here!" Pellini (LSU's current defensive coordinator, a bastion of stability)
  • A rising star like Rich Rodriguez (WVU's hotshot coach hasn't looked as fantastic in the absence of his OL coach, Rick Trickett...who now coaches the 'Noles)
  • An NFL assistant coach, perhaps? But who?

So let your predictions be heard. This, folks, should be fun.

1 comment:

Brandon said...

The saddest part of all this is that Lloyd Carr will no longer be giving sideline interviews. Nobody could stick it to a reporter like he could, although Miles is clearly his successor in that department.

Whatever happens to Mangino, I hope he gets some more attention. I can't wait until somebody makes a sign to flash on Gameday that says "MANGINA". (Rhymes with ... well, you know.)

Spurrier's not going anywhere. He's enjoying himself too much where he is - he wants to take one of the crappiest teams in the SEC and make the greatest.

Best bet is on Tuberville, who despite having just about everything he would need for a championship, keeps getting busted down by stupid stuff.

Most hilarious potential scenario:
Miles expresses interest in Michigan, causing Nick Saban to jump ship at Alabama. Miles then pulls a Nick Saban - er, I mean a Billy Donovan - and decides to stay at LSU. Alabama has already hired Mangino (for my own personal amusement), and Saban is forced to coach high school, stalking the sidelines looking even more like a serial killer than he normally does. In the first game of the season, he is punched out by an opposing quarterback's dad.

The end.